As I ventured out and waited patiently for my first customer I thought I’d restock the water and sweets. Front has been fine because people like to be chauffeur driven. I got to the back seat, oh look a taffy wrapper that someone didn’t chuck out, “plop” oh what was this hard object falling out of the wrapper? I picked it up. Yuck! Oh my lord it’s nose candy! Right in front of my eyes was an inch long nose nugget. Some bastard had been gold mining their nostrils and left me not one, but two pieces of green hardened mucus. Yuck! I quickly grabbed a tissue and a bag and deposited the grossness and contaminated lollies into it. It wasn’t pee, poo or vomit, but snot! That’s the first gross thing I get? Unbelievable. Who was it? Trying to think who it could’ve been! Who had the audacity to pick and plop their snot where food and drink sit? There’s bloody tissues on the floor! For Pete’s sake! I frantically washed my hand with my water and quickly grabbed an armor all wipe and wiped my hand and the cup holders. Nasty. I have handled so many gross things in archaeology and dealt with it, but this??? You’ve got to be kidding me!
After reeling over that little ordeal I went and got new brakes and fuel for my thirsty car. I contemplated whether I should put Additech into my car, then I read some reviews and realized fuel additives are a scam. Cool I won’t waste little money I have on superfluous crap. Then in all this time I realized no one had pinged me. I clicked the screen and this happened. A different kind of booger. This was the start of many headaches to come for the rest of the day. It was indeed a Monday.
I rang Uber and they told me to turn my phone off and on again in typical IT Crowd fashion. Really? I hadn’t thought of that. Come on! I had done that twice before I rang you. I troubleshooted with them until ping! Okay I gotta go.
Ben, he was a short trip from the airport. Meeting a mate at Five Guys Burgers and Fries. Can’t recall anything significant about him.
Amy she was from Tacoma. This was her first Uber ride, she asked how much would I charge her to go to Tacoma I said $100 cash. She said the bus is $30. I said well i can’t beat that, but she said I would have rather used you, because I hate buses. I understand, buses are uncomfortable and they stop a lot. By the way she was visiting an old friend from primary school called Chris, he wanted to be more than friends and organized her to leave via Uber and bus. Crazy. Poor girl she just wanted a friend after a nasty breakup. She asked if she could use my driving capabilities in Tacoma I said possibly.
Uber eats was next and I didn’t realise the promotions had stopped so I reluctantly said yes to it. I had to pick up food for Marko at the Village Pub and Grill. The App took me to the rear of the property and then it hit me. I’ve been here before with a few mates before Isaac and Andrea. I should have known not to trust the Uber App on this one. After picking up the food the guy lives 2 minutes away from the bloody place driving, he honestly could have walked there and sat down, but no he had to get me all the way down there. After attempting to find his so called apartment. He found me. Thank goodness. After he reached through my window to grab his mysterious meal, I clicked delivered in the app. $3.34! Are you kidding me? No more Uber Eats! No promotion? Not worth it.
Elizabeth was my next guest and she was telling me how she was going to see her bf at Jack off in the Box. On the way she also told me where she worked and how her new bosses wanted to reduce everyone’s pay. Wow must be an American thing. My former boss wanted to demote me, and then found out he wouldn’t be able to due to immigration. That would be unheard of in Australia reducing pay. All the staff at her work got together and went on strike. So their 13/hr could stay where it was. They ended up increasing it to 13.50/hr instead. Nice one! Archaeologists in the USA and UK take notes! Don’t accept anything less than what you’re worth ever.
More malfunctions and issues. A network error and my app wanted to know if I wanted to stay online. Of course! How else am I supposed to earn a living right now? Rang Uber again to notify them. They told me the same things I already did. Bugs! Bugs with the App.
Michael a navy vet that had been to Perth, Australia in 1993, was next to grace my vehicle an active border patrol employee. He had his two kids and wife with him and what appeared to be an endless amount of bags! Tetris here we go. He seemed nice and told me the media is exaggerating the border issue on both sides. I kinda knew that, but I didn’t raise any questions about the unlawful imprisonment of people without papers. He’s just a regular guy following orders and their instructions are subject to change no matter who’s in office. He said I should join them when I become a citizen. Great pay and benefits. Yeah mate sounds like a great gig after what I’ve had to deal with over the past few years. I told him about my situation and how hard it’s been. He said at least you’re doing it legally some people just don’t care and we have to pay for it. Moving on I said well I can’t get unemployment unless I become a citizen, guess my tax dollars is paying for you to keep people like me in check. Interesting cycle really. Right now if I leave the country I would most likely get stopped again by border patrol because they can’t read a piece of paper that says multiple entry permit. I’ve had two CBP officers say my piece of paper is a one time use only document. This is why I don’t dare leave again until I get something that’s easier for them to read. Like a green card. I kinda said that to him and he said he just drives around in a car all day. Fair enough, that’s probably better to be honest. I drove up to his house and wow! Massive! How much does this guy make? He gave me 5 stars. He was my 150th 5 star rating and my 250th passenger. Still only one 4 star rating and 99 people didn’t rate me. Better than a 1 star or another 4 star rating to be honest.
My next customer was by far the strangest coincidence I had ever had. Archaeology is officially haunting me. I picked up Scott, a civil engineer from Aslan Brewing. As I do I said G’day and we chatted about Australia etc. Then I asked him where we were going he said he wants to look at some of his jettystone at the Port of Bellingham. I misheard him and asked him what he said, he replied they’re big stones. I paused and said are you kidding me? Are you talking about the specific rock that they use for ballast for jettys? Yes. I told him I know what you are talking about. Really? What do you know he retorted. A few months ago I worked as an archaeologist and we did a survey for that specific material. There are only two locations in the entire country that have this stone type. It is an Army Corps of Engineers approved material. He was shocked that I knew so much. He said where was this stone? So I told him. He knew the company and said F them! We just took them to court. I’ll pay you $100, 000 to find Native American remains in that location. Wow, what is happening? My mind couldn’t work out what was happening. Then we rocked up to the security gate. I relayed to the guard exactly what Scott told me to say. He didn’t understand or follow. Scott got out of the car and said it all again that he wanted to see his stones. He opened the gate and we went to the giant gray stones. He wanted me as a scale and took photos of the stone. He then took a leak by one of the stones. Then he asked me more questions about archaeology and what I can do. I told him there’s nothing I can do without an LLC. I drove him back to Aslan, where he had to locate his rental mustang. This was very mysterious and odd. After dropping him off I thought hopefully those photos of me won’t come back to bite me. I needed him to get out of this enclosure.
After my confusing situation I headed back to the airport where two flights were coming in. I waited for some time when someone else went ahead of me. Wait a minute! It should have been me first. I was here before anyone. Oh what the heck? My app says I’m still south! Oh my last trips were 0 miles! What’s the meaning of this? Rang Uber and told me to do everything I have done multiple times and it seemed to fix it. Ping! I might have missed out on some customers on a flight I inadvertently missed due my dodgy app.
Alex my final customer. He was here for a construction project. He mentioned that when I picked him up I was 3 minutes away until boom I showed up. Thought I was still over there. Super glitchy day.
Anyway that’s it. Till tomorrow.
