Fruitful Fridays began with me wearing a troll mask I picked up for $6.99 at Value Village. Tonight, I became the Candy Troll! My first passengers were at the RV park dressed as Little Red Riding Hood and a witch. Two sheilas heading to the Spirit Walk. A walk in the village where you get to sample spirits. Actually sounded fun and I didn’t realise that was Friday night. I wore my mask and did not scare my passengers the first time around, they just said “nice mask”. Then they proceeded to give me lollies small lolly bags including M&MS. Great now I have more sweets to give to my passengers. As I was dropping my riders off I saw a fantastic Forest Gump costume, vampires, wookies, and scary clowns.
My next passenger was a man out of costume. He was meeting a friend for dinner. He was dressed up, perhaps he was on a date. Abel was his name as in Abel Tasman. I couldn’t help but make a comment about his name. “Are you named after Abel Tasman?” He replied “no, not at all. I don’t even know who that is”. Obviously I had to give the man a history lesson. Australia has a rather large island off the coast of the continent approximatley 500 km or 310 miles away from the mainland known Tasmania. Who was it named after well a Dutchman by the name of Abel Tasman. The explorer originally called it Antonio Van Diemans land after the Dutch East Indies Governor General Antonio Van Dieman in 1642. It was later shortened by the British. With the eventual name change in 1856 to just Tasmania after the first European explorer. My passenger didn’t expect a history lesson over his name, but he got it. Meanwhile the poor rider is most likely of Dutch heritage and Abel might just be a common Dutch name.
I dropped him off at his destination and got a ping nearby. The riders loved my mask and were off to Value Village to pick up a Halloween costume.
Next customer was a bus driver from Pierce County and told me he’s been working as a bus driver for 25 years. He loves it and said it has good benefits. I drove him to Kulshan Brewery so he could drink the night away.
Now my next passengers were in the boonies. It was almost rural. As per usual I made sure my candy troll mask was on before arrival. I roll up and wait. I hear footsteps. I lower my window and in one motion I stick my head out the window rapidly and yell “Boo!” “Oh my God, argghh”. Was the reaction. I actually scared someone. Haha yes. I took the mask off and welcomed my riders. As soon as they found out I was an Aussie they wanted to know all the slang. Bogan, nong, dero, g’day, hoo roo, yobbo, wanker. All made an appearance. “What do you call a street person?” “Dero, as in derelict”. “What do you say when you chug a beer?” “Skull, we skull a beer”. I also mentioned a classic drinking song from university in relation to skulling a beer.
“Here’s to …….. he’s/she’s True Blue! He’s a Piss Pot through and through. He’s a Bastard so they say and he’s not going to heaven he went the other way! He’s going down! down! down! down! down!…” you can either chant down until the drink is gone, but I remember “All the way down, all the way down, all the way down”.
Ah yes good old fashioned Australian culture. Drinking and singing. Americans love our larrikan life and easy going attitude.
Next passenger was on a date and forgot her ID. I thought this a great opportunity to get a repeat drip back into town after I drop them off. I even hung out, but when she ordered another uber. Someone else in the vicinity got her instead. It’s because I was near the airport and the other uber was like 2 minutes away.
Then I got a got a bloke in Ferndale who does body work on vehicles. Including Porsches, Ferraris, and Lamborghinis. The lucky bugger gets to drive them after he’s done, to make sure the car is in working order. He said insurance usually pays for everything. Couldn’t help think at how much those insurance costs would be each month. He didn’t take any of the Candy the Candy Troll gave him, but he said if it was Australian candy he would have definitely taken some. I laughed and said “yeah those sweets are for me. No one else”. I was tempted to give him a strawberry Freddo, and thought nah. Best not to share those. You don’t need to know how good those are.
Scared students were next. The troll mask was too much for them at first. They were dressed as angels, cats, and an air force pilot. Once they realised I wasn’t a threat they hopped in. “Oh you’re Australian”. One girl said. “Yes I am”. One of the girls had studied anthropology and said it was only minor. Oh you have a minor in anthropology. I see. The ride was only short, but they booked me again for later.
More scantily clad students needed a lift into town. One was dressed as an elf and the other was maybe Captain America? The female version? I wasn’t sure, but I know her butt was showing. It was essentially a g string, onesie thing. Ay carumba. Aren’t you cold??? Halloween certainly brings out some characters that’s for sure.
Next I had some VIP pickups heading home. Some great mates who bought a bottle of the Dubliner Irish Whiskey liqueur from me. Such a beautiful drop. 99% of people who have tried it. Love it. In America you can buy it from Ace Spirits an online shop. In Australia you can buy it at Dan Murphy’s.
More students dressed normally. “No Halloween party?” “Tomorrow, nice mask by the way”. Not scary for them.
Another student, she was dressed as a cat American thing. Red, White and blue, with cat makeup. Not sure what you’re doing there. She’s studying marketing. Oh righto. Couldn’t help but think what are you marketing here though?
Now it’s getting intense. Ping after ping after ping. Rocking up to the nightclub I ask for my passengers name, this guy on his phone says “no, but I’ll pay you cash to tale me home”. I said well “let me check with my rider whenever he shows up”. Next thing you know my passenger shows up. Then the chap who asked for a ride invites himself in my car and asks the bloke in the back politely “can I use your uber to get home, I only have cash, don’t have a debit card and never used uber before”. How have you never used Lyft or uber? Where has this young fellow been living? Under a rock it seems. My passenger in the back said yes to him joining us, but he seemed a little standoffish at first. Reluctant, but cautiously saying yes to it. I wasn’t too sure where he was going so hopefully not too far from my actual passenger. The bloke in the back is an FA18 fighter pilot from Whidbey Island. My freeloader passenger was a roofer, who wanted to be a fighter pilot, who was discharged due to possession of weed 12 years ago in Florida. This was before it was medically legal. Now he learns how to fly Cessnas. Yep both my passengers talked to each other most of the way. They could have exchanged numbers, but it didn’t happen. After dropping off Top Gun, I proceeded to drop off Top Freeloader. Oh good he’s on the way back south to the bars. He talked my ears off the whole way there. As promised he paid me cash and left my vehicle.
More students surge time. More money here we go. Right around 1.30 am is when I was getting super busy. I picked up a bunch of students. Some who requested me earlier in the night. Including bare butt Captain America and the angels. The elf and bare butt, scantily clad sheilas had two extra people with. Two military chaps. The sheilas were wasted, but the blokes didn’t seem too drunk at all. Obviously they were going back their hotel, but I couldn’t help think that one guy might get a bit carried away with them later. It was a little awkward, it’s none of my business per say what they do, but I couldn’t help think that bad decisions might be made here. It was an awkward vibe I got. I’m not their protector by any means, but I just thought these guys are not going to take no for an answer. One of the girls even invited me up for a drink. “No thanks, I’m working”. Was it a cry for help? Or was it just friendliness? I didn’t look at her face when she asked me. I just wanted to get away from the situation.
More students including a political science major, who doesn’t want to be president. With more computer science majors. A rather drunk student in a Harry Potter costume. With one person studying mental health not in costume, but wants to work with children. She made a joke about Bill Gates opening the flood Gates with technology. It was a coincidental joke, but it was hilarious.
My next passenger was dressed as a unicorn, but had a remarkable story to tell about why she was studying special ed. Her brother sustained a massive head injury from falling on his head when he was younger. No insurance to help him talk or function again. The money to get him back to normal were innumerable. This incredible lady looked to other alternatives to help her brother get back to normal. She looked at Pinterest of all things to look at ways to help his mind functioning properly again. One technique she found was fill a large tub or oversized Tupperware with water and place a ping pong ball in it. Blow the ball across the water to the other person and encourage the patient to blow the ball back. Like a game. She would do this exercise daily and as a result it rewired his brain to a point where he could say her name again. It was his first word since the accident. Her name. She was over the moon, excited because she knew that this was a corner that her brother could now turn. I love stories like this because it makes the human brain the most remarkable and complex organ we have. I have more questions as to why the brain can be damaged, yet in multiple cases can be rewired to function to it’s initial state. Is it based on memory stored in Another part of the brain, knowing what it used to do? Or is it learning from scratch? Why are we blessed with this incredible organ? And how come not many people use it?
I dropped her at her apartment and proceeded north to home. I forgot to put my destination into my app. So I left myself wide open to pings heading south. I was tired when I saw this giant wolf like creature. Orange ears and grey and white coat. Was it a dog? A coyote? It didn’t look scrawny like a coyote and too big to be a wolf. It stood there on the side of road near Custer staring at me. Mouth open. It had a thick coat with a bushy tail. Big teeth and was extremely tall. I wanted to turn around, but a customer. I wish I had a dash came for these moments, because that was the most impressive wolf like creature I have ever seen. I have seen dingoes and coyotes in the wild before, but not a wolf. It’s snout was strong and long.
I picked up my next passenger who was a boat trailer builder. Him and his mate loved my mask. Yes I was still putting it on. I asked them about wolves in the area. One said they’re usually in East near the mountains, but wouldn’t be surprised if they come west for livestock. Farmers unfortunately shoot wolves because they mistake them for coyotes and also to protect their assets. As a result of culling wolves moved east for a better life. Was this four legged creature a wolf? I wish I had slammed on the brakes to snap a pic. I’d never seen anything like it. It was majestic. Powerful. It could tear me limb from limb if it had the chance, but it’s face seemed noble and honorable. Like it wouldn’t hurt a fly. The man in my car sparked my imagination for wolves in Washington. How many are left? Where are they? Do they come to the urban environment? I know there’s a cougar near where I live. It was near an archaeology site I excavated and monitored for three months. The neighbour saw it at 4.30 am in the morning lying on their lawn. Wolves I feel are more skittish in nature. It’s the difference between dogs and wolves. Dogs will come up to humans and not bat an eyelid. I remember the wild dingoes in South Australia. They would run away from humans most of the time, unless they had become camp dogs from people feeding them.
Before I dropped my passenger off I got another ping from Lyft. I’m so close to home! Dammit. I’m getting tired. I accepted the trip. South I go after plonking my rider off. Ferndale. I picked up my next passenger. A pre school teacher. She was nice, but I was getting too tired to talk and concentrate. We discussed having such a big influence on kids at such a young age. My passenger loves her job. I dropped her off 30 minutes south and then another ping. No! Cancel. I’m turning around. Ping oh what now? Fine last trip. It was to the airport. Two ladies going back to Arizona in town for a real estate conference. I chatted about the fond memories I’ve had about Arizona including the cool archaeology they have there. Including Montezumas monument. After dropping them off at the airport I turned off all the apps and headed north. The wolf was nowhere to be found heading home.
Uber 11 trips Lyft 12 rides! With one random. Here are some comments from my riders over the week.
