Yeah you’re probably thinking that’s a bloody long title. Well it’s all about the titles for sure. It sucks people in, but every one of the above is somewhat accurate. Except there’s no lion or a witch. Everything else is somewhat accurate.
My first customer was a portly man. No it wasn’t. It was a lovely lady who works for a sustainable outdoor decor company. She travels from Alaska to Oregon. She goes out of her way to locate sustainable wood mills for the purposes of creating outdoor furniture etc. She said one of her clients is in Australia. Wonderful news. I told her I want to start a sustainable clothing line with a kickass logo. She told me she doesn’t know any sustainable clothing manufacturers. Oh what a shame. Guess I’ll have to keep researching it. First things first get the logo up and running and go from there. Yes this ride/share thing is developing into something rather unexpected, but could be my key to success. I have been successful in archaeology, but I’ve always wanted more. Maybe a PhD, perhaps a few journals? Sometimes you have to step off the path and reflect and keep moving forward. Life is full of different pathways.
People always ask me what’s been my greatest find as an archaeologist. I usually tell them the highlights, but to be frank it’s the people you meet along the way that have been extremely interesting. The greatest find is people. We’re a species that are unique, fascinating, yet destructive, we’re influential and we are driven. Everyone has goals, but different ones can pop up in one’s life. It’s like evolution. Homo sapiens sapiens, didn’t just become what we are today it took millions of years of breeding and different pathways. When my former honours supervisor professor Mike Morwood passed away in 2013. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I learned a lot from that man. His theories changed over time from different pathways. One in particular was when his team found a small skull 20 metres underground in a cave in Liang Bua Flores, Indonesia. Homo floresiensis. Not Homo erectus, which is what he was looking for, but something from a different evolutionary pathway. Life isn’t linear at all. Even though from birth to death it seems like a straight line, it isn’t. The Lion in this blog could be seen as professor Morwood, he was courageous in bringing forth the theory of a totally new hominid that no one had seen before.
After dropping my passenger off at the bus depot. I got another ping in the same area. A gentleman that may need archaeologists in the future. Sure enough he gave me a business card and said we get them in often and want an alternative to what we have right now. I dropped him off at a lunch spot on Meridian. Awesome have fun mate, meanwhile I’ll eat my tuna fish sandwich caught by sustainable methods, like a fishing line instead of a net. Hold onto your thoughts on this one. Sustainable food is hard to come by and a fishing line is hardly good for environment either. Especially if it is dumped in the ocean. Not to mention the fish hooks that are dropped into the ocean. I love fishing, but I haven’t been in a very long time. When licenses came out in Australia all those years ago. I think I went twice after the countless times I went. I used to go with my dad when I was a kid. My first flathead was when I was 5 years old. I also remember going with my mum’s ex boyfriend. He was a grumpy man that tried to be a so called father figure in my life. He took me out fishing at a little place called Hope Island, on the Gold Coast, he managed to catch a mangrove tree. Nice one 👍🏼. My favourite incident was when we lived near Sanctuary Cove on the Gold Coast. There was a river a few blocks from the house and he thought he’d try to take me fishing again. First cast of the line and a jet ski speeds past and manages to hook the line and sinker on the rider. Oh he blew up. Such anger, such frustration. The Collingwood (Australian Football League) supporter was absolutely ropeable. Expletives thrown around like they were going out of fashion. I think I was about 8 or 9 years old. The jet ski turned around banked up onto the shore of the river. “I believe this is yours”. Meanwhile I’m trying not to laugh at this spectacle. We went back home. In fact I only had fond fishing memories with my dad as a kid. My other fishing memory was with a mate of mine and fish I pulled up was a sizeable bream. As I went to take it off the hook it wriggled right out of my hand and cut my leg open. The fin on the back was as sharp as a knife. The fish managed to wriggle it’s way back in the water and swim away. Fishing always brings back memories of some hilarious times and fond ones.
I had a lady studying art and writing grace my car. She wasn’t 100% sure what to do with her life. I said you’ll figure it out. I said after 10 years of archaeology I still don’t know what to do.
Then my next passenger. Oh you just can’t believe the coincidence here. I get a ping over at the Gateway Inn across the road from Fred Meyer. Clayton was the name. This man looked familiar for some reason in the face. He was wearing a suit and his cologne was quite overpowering. Where have I seen this man before? “G’day mate, where are we off to?” “The courthouse”. “Righto, feel free to have some of the sweets and water back there”. “First class service”. He replied. “What do you do for a living?” “I’m in law enforcement”. Then I looked at his face again. He’s the bloody cop who gave me a ticket a while ago. I smirked and asked him “are you the fellow that gave me a ticket a while ago were you”? He paused and smiled awkwardly, “I might have been”. The atmosphere in the car was now so thick you could probably cut it with a knife. I went on a rant on how many times I’ve been pulled over in Washington, the most of any location I’ve ever lived. His voice cracked a little. What am I going to do with you? I thought to myself. He became more nervous as I went on. What does he think I’m going to do? Lock the doors and take him to a river and say I think we’re going to take a little drive. Ha no I’m not like that. So I made him more comfortable about asking him about what he does specifically and if he is a local or did he grow up somewhere else. His nerves dissipated and he became more relaxed. Humans are indeed fascinating. I asked him if he needed an uber later and he said he might. I dropped him off at the courthouse. He gave me a $5 tip and a 5 star rating. What a coincidence. Yes I was annoyed that he gave me a ticket, but I never thought I’d see a police man get uncomfortable with one of his revenue payers driving him around.
Next was a student studying digital marketing. He wants to work for Nike. Hey one day you might. Put I the hard yards and you’ll get there.
My next customer was Marko, yes I wanted to say Polo so bad. That wonderful pool game where everyone tries to get away from the person with a blindfold or eyes shut. The person with their eyes shut yells Marco. The others yell Polo and the blind person listens to the voices and tries to tag the next potential Marco. Fun game, but it’s ridiculous tough if you’re the one I darkness trying to find your next victim. My passenger works at a nightclub in town. His glasses were incredibly round and looked like a psychologist waiting to ask me about my childhood with a thick German accent. He was American though and in my honest opinion should be wearing rectangular spectacles, but that’s none of my business.
Oh my next customer she was a mathematics teacher at Bellingham Community College. She obviously just had a ciggie, because the smell wafted into my car. She picked I was an Aussie and said she had family down under. She said I must get annoyed at all the people who say “G’day mate” I said no because I say that all the time. You know what annoys me? Shrimp on the Barbie. We don’t say that. Paul Hogan why? Prawns! Prawns on the Barbie, that’s what we say. The funny thing is when I would go to say something, she would interrupt me before I could finish a sentence. I know you wanted rapid fire responses but geeze please let me speak. She meant well though and obviously wasn’t doing it on purpose. It was difficult. She was trying to finish my sentences for me, but was totally wrong. I would say something different and she would say ooooh. Yeah not what I was going to say.
Next passenger was a gentleman who works at the Oyster House in town. He told me the Uber drivers are more accommodating for their riders. I asked him how so? He then proceeded to tell me about his wife in Houston about a week ago and the rain was pelting down, to the point where a whole road had flooded. The driver told her he’ll get her to the airport no matter what. I believe they had to wait another night to get to the airport. Next morning the driver was there on time and ready for her. He got her to the airport safe and sound via another route. He was tipped $100. That’s commitment to the job right there and deserves something from uber in my opinion. My rider told me he was going to Spain in a week or so and I said please loom at my blog over there and I’ll tick off another country on my map for my blog. He agreed.
Then I had the Lowe’s manager in my car again. He remembered me from when he was pumping iron that one night. I found out he also works as a bouncer in town and said I should work Saturday night. I said I’ll think about it. The life of a bouncer I told him I have been escorted out of two nightclubs in my life. I explained what happened and he said they were just looking out for you. Yeah you’re right.
After dropping him off I got a ping in Fairdinkumhaven. A massage therapist. Huge Andrew Yang fan. Mainly because he has statistics and facts to assist his Democratic campaign. That’s a fair reason. I can’t vote because I’m not a citizen. So you vote for who you like. I’m not going to stop you. His name was Rye and he was wearing a jacket with the tag on and it said Orange Rye Bread. Ha legend. I see what you did there.
The night was creeping upon me and I had been quite busy for a Wednesday. Then I got another ping. It was for Blue Wednesday. Four students going into town for a late one. I could have stayed out. Later but I was getting tired. I’ll save the late one for fruitful Fridays. All were so new to uni that I definitely felt old here. They took all my candy and water in the back compartment. That’s fine. I’m outta here after I drop you off.
Over 10 Trips and a busy day indeed. There was definitely no witch. Oh there was no bag the size of a wardrobe this time. That’s the following day.
