My morning began by me taking my car to get cleaned professionally at Auto 360 off the Guide Meridian near Ferndale. The guy quoted me $100, but on closer inspection changed his mind to $50. Wow OK cool. I went next door to the servo to get money out. Sure enough the ATM is charging me a whopping $2.95 for the service fee. He said he would also take a cheque, but I hate cheques so I don’t carry them around with me. I wandered back and there was a gentleman spraying my car vigoursly. Vents, carpet, dash, seats, and vacuuming all the nooks and crannies. I watched in admiration. Wish I had a contraption like that. I imagined me cleaning the vomit like that only, I’m sure it’d ricochet up off the vent and hit me in the face. Yuck. The gentleman was from Mexico and had lived in the states for 16 years. We talked about the how difficult it is now compared to what it used to be. Oh I can only imagine. How do you make it in America? You might find the norm is paycheck to paycheck.
As I paid for the work I have them more for a tip. The guy was going to give it back to me and I said no you keep it uber paid me for this work. I got back into my car and noticed the sun visor had a bit of chunder on it still. I told the guy and he cleaned it immediately. Cheers cobber. Off I went to start my day. I went north and then west and then ping a customer so soon?
I travelled into Ferndale cutting through the main Street and into the burbs. New, fresh housing estates that all look the same then a road closure. Oh for crying out loud. I took a detour around to the other side and made my way up to my rider. As I’m doing this the app kept telling me to turn around. No! I sidled up beside my rider and he said my name. He was a cool Indian man from New Delhi. Like something out of a high end Bollywood film. Sunglasses and a jacket. He was on his way to pick up his Mitsubishi sport car. I commended him on his car choice. Then I asked him what he did, prison guard at the penitentiary. “Bet you get some interesting characters through your jail”. “He went on to say “Yes we do, one guy has been arrested for incident exposure 13 times! Every time he gets arrested for the offense he is let out again within two days. Then he does it again, he can’t help but pull his junk out in public.” I obviously laughed at this hysterically. “He must have a medical condition or something.” He agreed with me. Most of the criminals around here are DUI offenders or petty crime. It made sense to me, not much to do in a small town except drink and um well do a nudey run around town. The ride wasn’t long enough to keep talking with this chap.
After dropping him off at his car I made my way to B’ham. First passenger in town was two ladies I had picked up before. One lady had busted her foot chasing a cat. Her daughter on the other hand was up from the bay area to help her out. Two whole months she has been here helping her mother out. I picked them up and said “long time no see.” They laughed and remembered me. We chatted the whole way to the Money Tree. Next door to the cannabis dispensary. The lady must be in excruciating pain. I have never partaken in smoking this new legalised narcotic. I’ll stick to booze thanks.
Next customers were picked up at the Guesthouse Inn. They asked me “are there a lot of Aussies in town here?” I said “no, why? I mean I haven’t seen them” one of the riders said “there were a lot at Aslan Brewery last night”. “Really? What for?” I replied. They couldn’t tell me, but there’s someone who works there who’s an Aussie. I find it funny when you are overseas living elsewhere, you tend to seek out your fellow comrades. It’s refreshing I suppose. I’m sure if I was an American in Australia I’d seek out other Americans. You want to see if they’re going through the same situation as you, or maybe they have more experience here. My riders seemed a little standoffish I mean they seemed kind of rude and abrupt about the Australians. It was their tone I didn’t particularly like. Not very casual. It was strange, I had a thought of maybe the Aussies ruined the atmosphere. “AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE!” “OI OI OI!” Yeah maybe. 🤣😂
Once I had dropped them off I went over to my usual spot off Lakeway Dr. I noticed a car with fake human limbs stuck to the bonnet aka hood. Written in fake blood on the windscreen aka windshield was the words Crowd Killer. Ha OK must be a Halloween thing a month early. Funny bugger.
After waiting about 10 minutes I get a ping to the south of me at a Haggen grocery store. A future welding student. I asked her if she was going to be doing underwater welding by any chance? She wasn’t sure. Then I told her about a bloke from the Australian outback who lost part of his finger from a welding accident. He told me the adrenaline from losing his finger got him to finish the job real quick. There was no fixing his finger though. The lady was shocked by this. Sorry to freak you out but it’s still good money. She told me she originally thought of childcare as an option for a career, but obviously doesn’t pay too well. She told me she was from Alaska and that next month they’re only getting $1600 from the government. I said “hang on why?” “Oh the governor is a dick.” “Then I said he sounds pretty nice to me.” Apparently all Alaskan residents get a stipend from the government because they have resources. Some years it’s been up to $3000 just by being an Alaskan resident. Wow that’s excellent news. She went on to say “it’s pretty expensive up there” “oh righto”. Still I felt like I was missing out. She asked me about myself and I told her I was an archaeologist. She smiled and said I’m a native American. I knew that, but didn’t want to probe. I wish I had said something sooner, but every trip has a beginning and an end. Who knows? I might see her again one day.
Next customer was Mars. Yep I couldn’t help by saying I like ya name I think it’s out of this world! He smiled. Phew he can take a joke. He told me he was from Washington, but his heritage is Israeli. I immediately asked if he had been there. Yes, he had been there this summer. He hates flying though. Shame I love it. Except airport security. It’s a pain in the butt. He told me he had floated the Dead Sea and I replied I also did that in Jordan. Such a fabulous part of the world to visit. It’s such a shame there’s problems. I hope one day people can be safe in these areas.
After dropping him off next to the asteroid belt, my next customer was a lady who I had picked up once before. I knew the house, but couldn’t remember what she looked like. She was from San Francisco and I tried to refresh my memory and she said “You’re the man who drove that guy to Pittsburgh California”. “Yes that’s me.” The conversation wasn’t terribly exciting, only that she has a dog, which I think can be exciting for me. Dogs are the bestest.
I went to the airport after dropping her off and I picked up the owner of a boat fibreglass business. He had just returned from Alaska and I told him about the lady who mentioned the government money Alaskan residents get. He knew about it, he said if lived there for 5 years he would get it. The conversation was mainly about money from that point on. A new recession was mentioned, you know the one from last Friday. He had heard rumours, but a banking auditor stating that he immediately said “I’m going to sell my late wife’s truck”. She had passed away earlier this year and he didn’t want to get rid of it, because it reminded him of her. He enjoyed driving it and was reluctant to sell it. “Now this recession is coming up, having three trucks is unnecessary.”
Dropping him off I made my way north to stock up on more water bottles for my thirsty passengers. The day was getting late and I thought should I get anymore trips? Waiting at the light after purchasing the bottles I saw another homeless man. I said to myself if I get another passenger I’m going to give that man money. He had a sign saying “homeless I have three kids”. PING! The universe had spoken you’re picking up another passenger before you go home. Just before the light changed I put my window down and yelled at the man “mate, here ya go!” The man turned his head and shuffled over to me. He took the Money and said “thank you, God bless”. The light changed and I drove off to my next passenger. She was from Gambia, pregnant and off to work. I asked her how she found America. Expensive. Her first child she gave birth to in 2016 was $21,000 with insurance. I went white in the face. OK Australia for children it is. Not this place. How much is everyone else paying? She thought America would be better due to how it is advertised. The grass is always greener. Yeah it can be, but not always. We talked about our home lands and she mentioned she has family in Melbourne.
I dropped her off and went home. I needed to print off my new Lyft decals. I got approved.
Next time the Lyft and uber double dipping chronicles.
