Monday
My Monday started with the brekky runs, no not the digestive kind, which morphed into lunch. That’s when I noticed a bloke at the Dumpling King in a tactical kilt. He was ready to rain a small British village and eat dumplings whilst doing it. There’s a place in Seattle that sells these Scottish gems and I couldn’t help but ask him “are you wearing budgie smugglers under that kilt?” He looked at me blankly and queried my question with a question. “Budgie what?” He asked with a bewildered look upon his face. “Are you wearing knickers under that cloth?” I asked. “You know underpants, jocks, underwear, under armour, boxers, briefs, tight whities, or downunder cloth?” He responded “Yes for the best protection a man can buy”. Wonderful I grabbed the dumplings and left, the food of course just to be clear went on my way. There’s nothing like a cup of cold mind punch in the morning. Screw with people and they’ll be in perpetual confusion for the rest of their lives.
Not much else happened on Monday, but that was totally fine I had to focus on delivering essential food like baby back ribs and dumplings.
Tuesday
Taco Tuesday was the lowest fuel cost I had ever seen. $1.76/gallon. That’s like 0.58 cents a litre! Crikey crumbs you might as well just give the fuel for me for free. My first order was at a Mexican restaurant off Bakerview. Now most Mexican restaurants smell like delicious Mexican food, this one on the other hand smelled like teen spirit. Sorry no, raw sewage 🤢. It was unbearable and probably was in violation of several health codes. I wanted to get out of there fast. Disgusting.
That day I saw a rego that said GLORYUS. Yep. Cool story.
Wednesday
I met an Uber driver waiting at the dumpling place, where I saw the tactical kilt bloke. She was doing uber eats and she said “it was crap”. I said “I know”. She had to wait 4 hrs for an order. I said “sounds about right”. I told her to move over to Viking Foods.
Thursday
I went to a BBQ grill restaurant called Jekyll and Hyde and noticed on their register was a clip on koala. Just like the ones I have in my car. “Been to Australia?” I queried. “Yes, years ago with my wife. We loved it”. I couldn’t help but bring up memories of my homeland and delve into the Australiana. From kangaroos to kookaburras we discussed at length of the great southern land.
That same day I thought I found my long lost hubcap I had misplaced in that snowstorm a few months prior. It looked like it was going to be thrown out. I dropped off some Asian food to a lady and asked her about the hubcap just sitting by her doorstep. She had picked up further snow fall a few months prior. What were the chances? Before I came home to check the hubcap I delivered food to a mate I used to work with. It was great to see him again. I had distanced myself to all the people at Drayton. Psychologically it effected me. It wasn’t my mates fault that I got fired at all. He had seen people get the flick left right and centre. The boss was an unrealistic wanker with his budgets and couldn’t afford a senior. I wish I could have stayed and had a beer with my mates, but it was getting late and it was in a lockdown so couldn’t hang around.
After taking the hubcap home that night I compared it to my other ones, it was the wrong type. Right size wrong type. It didn’t have enough plastic prongs on the rim. I kept it anyway and replaced all my hubcaps. Yes now I have an odd hubcap on my car.
Friday
Friday was intensely busy and probably the most full on day I had doing viking foods. It was in the month of April and the pandemic was unleashing hell on people’s lives, and the economy. People were hungry and ready for any food they could find. I had made close to $300 in a day delivering food. It was also Vikings lAs I was coming home I encountered a Birthday drive by. I was stuck in it. People tooting and honking their horns and waving at a house that used to have my former bosses face on their front lawn. Yeah the political ones. I was angry I wanted to go home, but I was stuck behind these wankers. I called the cops on them. They’re disturbing the peace I thought. There wasn’t a way to turn around in this mess. Eventually after 15 minutes I came home and that was my week 4 with Viking foods. Coming up week 5.
